Fox News “legal analyst” – and suspected Roger Ailes surrogate – Peter Johnson, Jr. is very worried about proposed changes to Washington state’s marriage license in the wake of legalized same sex marriage there. The issue is not gay marriage per se, mind you, but changes to the marriage license. Apparently, standardizing the form from “bride” and “groom” to “Spouse A” and “Spouse B” is not just going to alter how Washingtonians view marriage but will, according to Johnson, cause a “big, big sea change” in heterosexual relationships and just about every other aspect of American society.

“So much for wedded bliss,” Steve Doocy sneered in his introduction. He "asked" whether the proposed changes are "a good idea or political correctness gone too far?"

To Johnson, changing the wording on marriage licenses is not just a bad idea but spells doom for heteros and maybe even society as a whole.

The issue is “husband and wife,” “bride and groom,” do the cultural kinship terms that go with heterosexual marriage go out the window? This is a sea change. This is a big anthropological change. This will change society in Washington and in other states forever!

…Where does it go? Do we no longer say “father and mother?” Do we only say “parent?” Do we no longer say “brother and sister?” Do we say “sibling?” Do we no longer say “widow and widower?” What does it mean in terms of our relationships and how we view each other?

…It’s not about gay marriage, it’s about what happens to heterosexual marriage and how those partners are defined and how those relationships go forward in our society. It’s going to have a tremendous, tremendous impact. If language is part of our culture, language defines our culture, language often defines our behavior. Watch this! See what happens. This is going to be a big, big sea change in our society and how the smallest of our children understand relationships between parents, between husband and wife, between mother and father. There are such things in our society and if our society continues, there must be.

Nobody discussed what kind of form or forms there should be and whether in these times of budget austerity it might be worth the extra cost of printing different forms for different kinds of couples. But I guess when the very existence of American society is at stake, money is no object!