The felonious former president said he would 'address the nation' by holding a 'press conference' at Bedminster on Thursday. That statement in itself would be funny if it weren't packed full of narcissism, and his 'presser' was littered with lies and attacks on his opponent, Kamala Harris, as he rambled on about Cheerios and windmills.

At one point, Lumpy painted a picture of what it would be like if Kamala became president.

"And you're not going to be allowed; you're all going to be thrown into a communist system," Trump said.

"It's a communist system; you're going to be thrown into a system where everybody gets healthcare."

Most Americans would love to have a socialized version of healthcare where we aren't inundated with bills. I've been buried with medical bills jammed into my mailbox. Many Americans face a time when an emergency can bankrupt them, or they know it could happen at any time. Sign me up!

This right here:

Don't worry, guys. If Von Shitsinpants gets in power again, he'll have a viable healthcare plan in two weeks. Just ask him!