Louisiana is about to become the first state to ban abortion medications as controlled substances, marking a stunning reversal from Louisiana’s history of being last in everything else, such as maternal health.
Gov. Jeff Landry (R-LA) is expected to sign a measure passed yesterday that would include mifepristone and misoprostol on the same list as Horse, China White, Sweet Lady H, and whatever the hell else heroin’s called in The Basketball Diaries.
Abortifacients have typically not been treated as controlled substances, due to their lack of addictive properties. However, it does appear possible that abortion medications could become habit-forming by acting on the brains of people terrified of raising a child in Louisiana.
(To wit, Louisiana Republicans also voted yesterday to deny lunch breaks to 16-year-old former fetuses even if they’re working more than five hours straight.)
Louisiana already banned every form of abortion other than to save a patient’s life or if the fetus is no longer viable (as a factory worker). Even children who are the victims of rape or incest are banned from having abortions because Louisiana.
While pregnant women can’t be prosecuted under the new law, anyone else who has these drugs but doesn’t have a prescription could go to jail. That would also bar pharmacies from selling abortion pills to people who’ve just had sex and fear they’re pregnant, and wish to abort the fetus when it’s still no more neurally developed than some Louisiana state lawmakers.
Sadly for fetuses and people, misoprostol isn’t just used for abortions. It’s also used to treat ulcers and help stop bleeding from miscarriages. Oh, and it’s also used in delivering babies … even the lucky few that Democrats choose not to abort after they’re born and attending kindergarten or, in Louisiana, working at an oil refinery.
Obviously, similar legislation is gestating in other backwards state governments. Louisiana’s bill began as a response to an incident in which a man gave his pregnant wife an abortion pill without her knowledge. Then someone got the bright idea of tacking on all possible uses of abortion medication. And here we are.
And here’s where we’re going…
Trump Frantically Attempts Pull-Out Method on Birth Control
It’s not just abortion that right-wing Christians are coming for. It’s everything to do with sex that isn’t within the bonds of marriage and also preferably awkward, brief, and deeply sad.Just yesterday, D4FRFP¹ Donald Trump suggested birth control could be made illegal if he’s elected re-president.
Specifically, banning birth control is an issue that should be left to the states, Trump ejaculated (IT ALSO MEANS “SAID”! LOOK IT UP! Yes, okay, it’s archaic, sure, but so is he.)
“Things really do have a lot to do with the states, and some states are going to have different policy than others,” Trump said in the political equivalent of having sex with a porn star while not wearing a condom.
Trump frantically tried to pull out before it was too late, but just doesn’t have that kind of control. And so, when he tried, he screwed that up, too, saying he “has never and will never” advocate for birth control bans. Thing is, that doesn’t rule out letting states have the bans.
Trump promised he’s got a policy coming soon on birth control, but he’s been promising that for abortion drugs for weeks now, with nothing in sight. IVF, too, I think? Who knows.
At this rate, Trump will be adding Christian nationalist bans on divorce to the Republican Party platform by convention time.
¹ D4FRFP = Disgraced, quadicted, fraudster, rapist, former President.
Published with permission of The Fucking News
