Earlier today, Matt Whitaker claimed that he had been "fully briefed" on the Mueller investigation and that it would end soon, or at least, that's what reporters heard. Media then lost their collective minds, taking him at his word that he actually knew something.

Here is what he actually said, and you should also watch the video of him at the beginning so you can see how he hems and haws all the way through.

"You know, I've been fully briefed on the investigation, and, you know, I look forward to Director Mueller delivering the final report and I really am not going to talk about an open and ongoing investigation otherwise. But, you know statements I made were as a private citizen, only with publicly available information. and, you know, I am comfortable that the decisions that were made are going to be reviewed, you know, either through the various means we have. But right now, you know, the investigation is, I think, close to being completed, and I hope that we can get the report from Director Mueller as soon as possible."

This wimpy statement pulled out of Whitaker's butt is what prompted every Beltway media outlet to light their hair on fire and send out a zillion news alerts to everyone. One of those someones was me, and I promptly turned around and passed that statement along to our team and some other friends while my hair was sizzling too. I may have even used the words "we're fcked" in some communications I sent. Because you know, the Washington Post reported it.

Now watch him in the video above. There's nothing at all definite about anything, as CNN Legal Analyst Jeffrey Toobin said later in the segment, right after Gloria Borger pretended it was all etched in stone, too.

"I have seen actual deer in actual headlights who express themselves more clearly than the Attorney General of the United States," Toobin said. "I have no idea what he's talking about, and this is very serious stuff."

"I mean, this man is utterly unqualified to be Attorney General!" he continued. "He cannot express himself about a matter of extreme importance, the Mueller investigation."

"What is he even talking about?"

That rant prompted Wolf Blitzer to ask whether Toobin thought the adult in the room was Attorney General nominee William Barr. His answer was pretty scary and annoying, to be honest.

"Well, yes," Toobin replied. "I mean, Barr, you know, showed during his confirmation hearing that this is a serious person with serious understanding of the law. And at least for the good of the country, it seemed like he can only be confirmed, you know, sooner rather than later because this Whitaker guy, I mean, I have no idea what he's doing there."

I think we all really do know what he's doing there. He's a Trump toady, there to do Trump's bidding. As an added bonus, he puts pressure on the Senate to confirm a guy who managed to not step on his neck during his confirmation hearing but is no prize at all. As long as Matt Whitaker is up there being a jerk, it makes Barr look like a far better choice.