After a very long meeting at the White House, an antsy Paul Ryan appeared before the microphones, clearly anxious for this nightmare to be over and his new gig working for the Kochs or a related organization to begin. McCarthy just looked like Kevin McCarthy usually does -- the suckup kid who is always there to help the teacher.

At any rate, here's where we are with the government funding resolution, according to these two.

The president informed us he will not sign the bill that came from the Senate last evening because of his legitimate concerns for border security," Ryan said, carefully avoiding the term "WALL."

So what we're going to do is go back to the House and work with our members. We want to keep the government open but we also want to protect the border. We have very serious concerns about securing our border...So we're going to go back and work on adding border security and also keeping the government open because we do want to see an agreement," Ryan concluded.

McCarthy followed up by using the words "border security" yet again while also invoking the usual "kicking the can down the road" nonsense.

Isn't that nice? Here's what's really happening:

Yep, that's right. The entire government is waiting for a...tweet.

What a happy day it will be when the adults take charge of the House.