July 13, 2018

Right about now the British are probably wishing we'd thrown this Orange Teabag into the sea. Here he is, positively Lincolnesque in oratory brilliance, expounding upon why immigration is, like, very much hurting, and I mean, Europe, you look at, I mean, you set one foot and it's the craziest thing with the lawsuits and you look at we never had a problem and with Angela. Merkel. I have a GREAT RELATIONSHIP with all of them and especially Angela. AAANNNGGGEELLLAAA.

Transcript (not that different from what I wrote above) below:

BRITISH REPORTER: Prime Minister, I wonder whether you agree with the President of the United States that immigration has damaged the cultural fabric of Europe and Mr. President perhaps you could elaborate. What do you mean by that?

TRUMP: I think it's been very bad for Europe. I think Europe is a place I know very well and I think that what has happened is very tough. It's a very tough situation. You see the same terror attacks that I do. We see them a lot. We just left some incredible young men and women at Sandhurst and they were showing us cells and they were showing us things that frankly 20 years ago nobody even thought about, probably a lot more recently nobody even thought about, I just think it's changing the culture. I think it's a negative thing for Europe. I think it's very negative. I think having Germany, I have a great relationship with Angela Merkel, great relationship but I think that's very much hurt Germany and I think it's very much hurt other parts of Europe. And I know it's politically not necessarily correct to say that but I'll say it and I'll say it loud and I think they better watch themselves because you are changing culture, you are changing a lot of things, you're changing security, you changing, I mean, look at what's happening. You take a look. Look at what's happening to different countries that never had difficulty, never had problems: it's a very sad situation, very unfortunate but I do not think it's good for Europe and I don't think it's good for our country. We're as you know far superior to anything that's happened before but we have very bad immigration laws and we're -- I mean, we're doing incredibly well considering the fact that we virtually don't have immigration laws, we have laws that are so bad I don't even call them laws I call them, it's just like you walk across the border, you walk across the border, just put one foot on the land and now you're tied up in a lawsuit for five years. The craziest thing anyone has seen so I would just make that recommendation to Europe. I've made it very loud and clear, I made it yesterday, 29 countries total and that's the way I feel.

I have questions. Do you have questions? I mean, because I HAVE QUESTIONS.

1. Who is he saying should watch themselves?

2. Are we really superior to "anything that's happened before?"

3. Do the children in cages agree we're "doing incredibly well?"

4. Do we really have a law called, "it's just like you walk across the border, you walk across the border, just put one foot on the land and now you're tied up in a lawsuit for five years?" I mean, I wouldn't put it past Congress, but is that really one of our laws?

5. Where are the countries that "never had any difficulty, never had any problems?" Is it Westphalia?

6. Has Donald Trump ever phrase he didn't mind pairing with another phrase whether or not they went together or made sense?

And then, of course, Prime Minister May gives her answer about immigration policy:

MAY: The UK has a proud history of welcoming people who are fleeing persecution to our country. We have a proud history of welcoming people who want to come to our country to contribute to our economy and contribute to our society and over the years, overall immigration has been good for the UK. It's brought people with different backgrounds, different outlooks here to the UK and has -- and we've seen them contributing to our society and to our economy. Of course, what is important is that we have control of our borders. What is important is that we have a set of rules that enables us to determine who comes into our country and that is what as a government we have been doing for a number of years, and will continue to do in the future.

Theresa May is hardly Britain's strongest or most beloved Prime Minister. Yet, in a fraction of the time it took the Creamciscle Shitgibbon to spew his racist, xenophobic, mind-numbingly vapid toxic waste, she managed to slaughter him with three things he will never, ever understand.

1. Empathy
2. Facts
3. Sentences

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